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Trust and insecurity issues

My September holidays are ending reaaaallll soon, and I'd like to talk about some personal topics before school starts! OH and the haze is getting really bad lately so i advise you guys to drink a lot of water and stay healthy or something! xD

Today i wanted to talk about some issues that I've stated in my title, that's right, trust and insecurity issues. I think that insecurities and trust issues are connected, you might have a few insecurities that have led you into not being able to trust someone. When it comes to talking about insecurities, there are:

  • physical appearance insecurities
  • relationship/friendship stability insecurities
When it comes to physical appearances, most people are insecure about the things that can't change, or don't make the effort to change. For example, you can't change your breast size unless you go for surgery, but most people can't afford it. There's also one of the most common kinds of insecurities, like weight or height. Some people try so hard to lose some weight, or to gain weight, and i used to be one of those that couldn't gain weight. More of a curse than a blessing. Some women may be insecure if they are too tall, and some men because they are too short.

If i were to honestly admit, I can be quite self absorbed. I tend to get very absorbed in my own appearance, and i don't have many insecurities. Of course i still try to remain humble. (insert weird all teeth squinty eyes smiley face)

The next one I'll be talking about are insecurities that have to do with friendship or relationships. These kinds are the ones i can fairly relate to, Maybe you've been betrayed, or lied to, that led you into being unable to trust someone. Maybe you gave someone a part of you, and they carelessly threw it away. Just maybe, they don't care.

In my case, i think too much. I think a lot. I tend to jump to conclusions and scare myself, causing me to lose hope and destroy everything. The other party doesn't even know what exactly is happening, and i keep blaming them, when its actually my own thinking. Sometimes, being paranoid helps. In such a way that i am prepared for what i think is going to happen, but it doesn't go my way most of the time. I might think i have everything prepared, knowing what to say, what to do. Until it actually happens, its totally unexpected. It just pops up as something that i haven't planned, and I'm just speechless.

What am i going to say? What am i going to do? Really though, I'm just worried of what they think of me the next day. Will i be an embarrassment? Will they avoid me? Will i avoid them?

It all comes down to me.



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