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Showing posts from November, 2015

Just some ranting

I had to update it a bit the next day because i had more to write about, and hopefully y'all don't mind. There were some weird typos i had to change too. Umm also, if you haven't noticed. I kept republishing the post not because i want publicity, but because i was desperately trying to find a way to password protect this post.

We live in a society where most, not all, people get everything they want.

I'm so sorry, i don't even know how to start this post while trying to be as real as possible without sounding like i want to offend people or that i want sympathy. I don't want any of that. I don't even need anyone to read this post, i just want a space where i can openly express myself  because i can't in real life. Firstly, i'm actually quite an emotional person, but i just don't know how to express it...properly. All i know is to laugh and cry. I absolutely don't like crying in front of people, i personally think that is downright e…

What i've learnt from turning 15

My birthday was just a few days ago, and i thought I'd make a post on it. It's just a short compilation on the things i have realised and learnt this year. I actually planned for this post to be published on my birthday. I even aimed for this post to contain 15 things I've learnt, but because of my awful planning skills and not being able to remember my ideas, here are 3! lololololol

1. To me, being 15 is kind of confusing. Its like a liminal stage between knowing that you're still a kid, with lots more to experience in life, or the fact that you need to be more mature because you're going to be treated like a young adult. I think about this a lot actually, sometimes I'm not really sure when i should transition into that "young adulthood" stage without having people say I'm such a bore, or that i should let loose a little.

The word "mature", is also somewhat subjective. In my case, being mature means that i am able to rely mostly on myse…

Shit you should never do unless you're me! -PART 10-

I've actually been working on a post that i'll be posting about a day or two later, so in the meantime, i thought i should post another one of my embarrassing stories. Maybe its a good thing for me, but i haven't really come across anything embarrassing enough to post, so i settled down for one of my ridiculous habits i had when i was younger.

Am i the only one that thinks that when you run, its really fucking awkward and unglamorous? No? When i was seven or so, i always thought that the running motion was really horrendous. Horrendous in a way that it looked like a gorilla trying to push its way through a crowd or something. I can't believe i'm saying this, but i decided to own my own running style. And i'm not proud of it. I used to think my running style kept me from looking weird but when i look back, i think i look even weirder. My running style was really really awkward, it was like i kept both my arms stuck to my sides, and my palms would be facing outwa…

Sleep paralysis

As the year is coming to a close in just less than two months, i decided to cover a topic that I've been facing for most of this year. Sleep paralysis. So this problem I'm facing right now has affected me quite a lot actually. I don't think i would have it last year, or even before that. It just started happening a lot this year.

I remember it starting off as a once every two months thing, but then it started happening about five times a month, then soon it got to three times a week, now its becoming almost five times a night. I can't even sleep without sliding into sleep paralysis consecutively. It's really been affecting my sleep schedule, and most of the times i wake up with a horrible headache. Just a side note, sleep paralysis can sometimes be really scary. Sometimes i wake up feeling really numb from the "nightmare", and try to fall asleep again, but i end up repeating the same cycle of my mind being awake but I'm paralysed. It gets super irrita…